Las Vegas, NV – This week Washington State Senator Maureen Walsh caused a stir when she blew the whistle on nurses playing cards all day. This prompted an immediate federal investigation into the situation, and one hospital is reporting they found a secret casino underneath the nurses’ station full of countless decks of cards.
“We saw this funny looking floor board under one of the nurse’s desks. When we pulled on it, we were all shocked. There was an entire hideout down there!” said Ron Jerson. “They had all sorts of snacks and stuff, but my hell you should have seen all of the cards! Thousands of decks!” Jerson said when they descended into the bunker, there was currently an intense game of Texas Hold ‘Em underway with some Emergency Medicine physicians, who also have very leisurely shifts.
We caught up with the charge nurse on the scene earlier today. “Obviously, we are really disappointed that we were exposed like this. We have been sneaking down here for years, often for hours at a time, and no one has ever noticed!”
We also spoke with another nurse at the hospital. “Our patients never push their call lights, doctors never call us non-stop with new orders, and often times our staffing ratio is 10 nurses to 1 patient. So clearly, we aren’t doing much anyway. What’s the harm in a few games of cards?”
White Coat Weekly has also received a tip that authorities are looking into where in the hell medical interns are all day, because they clearly aren’t working at all!