United States of America, USA – Happy National Nurses Week! Nurses around the country often complain they get too much recognition for the job they do. In previous years, hospital administrators have moved heaven and Earth to make National Nurses Week the most important week of the whole year. This year, however, administrators everywhere are competing to see who can show the least amount of gratitude.
“Last year we just did SO much to thank the nurses. It really was incredible. For example, I think I saw one in the hall and I smirked. I was thinking about that act of kindness for the rest of the week! I even told my wife and she couldn’t believe I’d been so selfless,” said Adam Ministrator, a local hospital CEO. After investigating the story a little further, White Coat Weekly discovered it was actually a female physician receiving the glorious smirk.
Another local administrator, Mitch C. Suite, said he has put the full hospital budget into devising a plan to win this competition. “We just love our nurses so much. We can’t think of a better way to thank them than winning this competition. So we have pulled out all stops – no one is allowed to talk to the nurses all week.” Mr. Suite thinks his hospital has a good shot at winning the competition since they have been on probation multiple times for mistreatment of nurses in the past. Anyone speaking to a nurse will be immediately fired, and if they thank a nurse they will be executed.
C.E. Ohh, chair of the board of directors at another area hospital, says she thinks unfortunately her hospital has already lost the competition. “Sadly, we bought all of our nurses decks of cards last week. This giant salary bonus probably disqualifies us. I guess we will start planning for next year!”
White Coat Weekly would like to thank everyone involved in this thrilling competition. We will continue to follow all events during Nurses Week 2019!