Tag: featured

Oxygen Shortages Force Nursing Homes To Switch To Helium Tanks

Phoenix, AZ – Anyone who has stepped into a nursing home knows you can’t get very far without tripping over one of the ubiquitous oxygen tanks. Recent oxygen shortages have led to an interesting situation, forcing nursing homes to switch to another, more interesting gas – helium.

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Thousands of Ribs Cracked After Everyone Accidentally Starts CPR at Bee Gees Concert

Omaha, NE – Anyone who has taken a CPR course knows chest compressions occur at about the same rate as the beat in the Bee Gees hit song “Stayin’ Alive”. Unfortunately, concertgoers got a little too excited once the song started playing at a show earlier this week.

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Emergency Department Celebrates Independence, Secedes From Hospital

Amarillo, TX – In a not-so-stunning move, an emergency department in Texas has formally seceded from the hospital it’s connected to. The emergency physicians claim to be sick of everyone’s crap and state they can do everything just as good as any specialist.

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New On-Call-ogist Really Misunderstood His Job Title

Orlando, FL – Recently, an oncologist (cancer doctor) from New York City was tired of his job and looking for a fresh start. He searched all over the country and thought he had found the perfect position in Florida. He was in for quite a surprise, however, when he realized he forgot to read the actual job title, which was for an On-Call-ogist.

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Week Before Residency Starts, Overzealous Intern Already Found Bathroom

With less than a week to go until the infamous start date of new interns nationwide, many residency programs are well into their orientation process. It’s looking like this whole residency thing isn’t going to be a problem for one intern, however. He already knows where the bathroom is and residency hasn’t even officially started yet.

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BREAKING: Nurse Eats Lunch

Camden, NJ – An unbelievable event happened this weekend when a nurse ate lunch. It is thought to be one of only a handful of times in history that this has happened. Nurse X, as we will call her, is currently in a witness protection program due to the unsafe predicament she finds herself in after taking the lunch break. However, she agreed to talk to us about the groundbreaking occurrence.

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